Another (last) go round

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Published on: October 8, 2011

(yes, yes… it’s been awhile… forgive me… please?)

This morning I watched the sun come up on Lake Michigan, with the city skyline at my back. Despite being a life-long Chicago area native, I’m pretty sure that this is the first time I’ve experienced this, and I’m glad that I hauled my butt out of the hotel bed to get out there.

I looked at both the sun coming up and the streets already prepped for the 45,000 marathon runners who would take over the next morning, and couldn’t help but reflect on the journey. I don’t know what it is, but sunrises and rows of virgin port-a-potties make me all contemplative, it seems.

So – yes – I’m running the marathon tomorrow. I know that I had proclaimed on a number of occasions that I was done with marathons… but, I knew I wasn’t quite done. I needed one more shot — one more go at not even necessarily hitting my goal time (and PR’ing the race), but going into it knowing that I did my homework and finishing knowing that I gave it 100% effort. My previous 3 marathons had extenuating circumstances of some sort — GI issues, heat cancellations, injuries — and I knew that for my own peace of mind, I had to have one “good” marathon.

The training started about 4 months ago. Well, actually, the training started shortly after my credit card got dinged with the impossibly high entrance fee, I suppose. I started building base, running here and there so I could get trained enough to even START the marathon training.

A new thing I did: I joined CARA (Chicago Area Runners Assocation) and signed up for their marathon training program. And without even knowing my results, I’m crediting my success to them. Doing the long runs with them not only made me accountable for the weekend miles, but the weekday miles, lest I not be able to keep up with my pace group.

Throughout the last 20 weeks, I’ve come to the same conclusion, though: I simply do not enjoy marathon training. Especially this time, when I did things right and really upped my mileage, I just get sick of running so much. Not only that, but everything else I do is prefaced with the question, “Will this affect my marathon training?” I’ve back off all strength training and other sports for fear of hurting myself, and I miss the variety that NOT marathon training offers.

But, when all is said and done, I did this one up right. In 2007, I thought I was well trained, having run about 335 miles over the course of my training. This year? 477 miles.

I’m as ready as I can be. My goal is sub-4 hours and a half marathon that I did on a whim a few weeks ago translates out to a 3:52 marathon. So – this is possible.

Really, the only thing that will keep me from this is me. This will be hard; it’s SUPPOSED to be hard. The biggest struggle will be mental. The urge to quit, to slow down, to make excuses why it might not be my day… the temptation is overwhelming sometimes. To not succumb, that is what a marathon is all about.

But, I’m stronger now. I’m determined that whether or not I hit my goal is second to whether or not I leave everything out on the course. I have friends and family coming out to watch (thanks, everyone! I appreciate y’all responding to my guilt trips!) and I can’t let them down any more than I can let myself down.

And this is my last shot at it. (really!) And I’m gonna do it.

Like a Nike sweatshirt told me, “Don’t Suck. Just do it.”

Introducing…

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Published on: April 12, 2011

…my new running partner!

Her name’s Belle, and while she might not look like she’s ready to run, believe me — I’ll be struggling to keep up with her!

As you can tell, she’s a tough-nosed dog, born on the streets, made for fightin’…

…or maybe not.  Maybe after her tummy rub.  Perhaps she’s just the cutest thing ever.  It’s also possible that I’m slightly biased.

Belle came to me in a roundabout kind of way:  a story of No-Good people and Do-Good people.

I had gotten an email from a friend of mine:  her co-worker — the Do-Gooder in this tale — had found a dog muzzled and tied up to a bench outside a laundromat.  The dog was hungry and scared, and when Do-Gooder inquired, found out that she had been there for days.  She had very recently given birth to a litter; she still was carrying milk.

Now, don’t get me started on the No-Gooders:  the person who abandoned her after she gave them the puppies they wanted.  The people in the business who KNEW that she had been out there for days (and it’s the Midwest in March!  It’s not like it was a balmy 65 degrees outside).  It really is beyond my comprehension how people can be like this.

But Mr. Do-Gooder, he took action:  untied the poor girl and brought her home with him.  Took her to the vet, fed her, got her all cleaned up.  And wanted to keep her, but realized that the best thing would be to find a good home for her, as he already had another dog and a small living space.

The email went out to me.  And it was like the stars aligned:  when I moved last month, one of the big upsides was that I’d be able to get a dog.  But – I wanted to wait. Wanted to get settled in and unpacked. Wanted it to be the “right” time.

It seems as though the “right” time picked me … so after exchanging a few emails with Mr. Do-Gooder, I went a met her and was immediately smitten.  She was friendly and curious, energetic, athletic and sweet. Everything I had been looking for.

And so, I brought her home with me.

It seems like she’s settling in nicely, too.

It’s been a joy to have Belle around (though – admittedly – she can be a little shit from time to time – good thing she’s so dang cute!) and I think I might have hit the jackpot with the universe dumping her in my lap, without me having to do one lick of work to make her mine.

 

 

Does moving boxes count as a workout?

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Published on: April 1, 2011

I hope so, because that’s been the bulk of my physical activity the last two months or so.

Which seems like a long time to be using that as an excuse for not training, doesn’t it?  And even LESS of an excuse for not blogging, I suppose.

But – it’s what I’m going with.  I’ve never claimed creative excuses as my strong suit!

My life’s been all manner of chaos for awhile, and just seems to now be settling down into a new normal, a new routine — something that I’ve been desperately waiting for.

I’ve got my old house rented out, so there are no more trips back out there to check up on it, which I’ve appreciated.

My (human) roommate has been moved in for almost 2 months now and we’ve managed to not only not kill each other, but actually co-exist pretty well.

And I’m slated to get my new (doggie) roommate on Tuesday!

So – everything’s falling into place.

This weekend will be the final push to get everything unpacked — I had gotten around to everything that I needed on a day-to-day basis, but had gotten tired and mostly bored with the process once that had been accomplished.  But this weekend?  I’ll be a an Unpacking Whirling Dervish!

I figure I should — even in the midst of the cardboard and bubble wrap flying! — be able to cobble some workouts together this weekend (if for no other reason than to have a legitimate excuse to not be unpacking for a bit).  And then starting next week?  At it full-time, with gusto, zeal and a resolve not seen around in here months.

And my 4-legged roomie-to-be is an energetic tyke:  she should force me outside even if I don’t exactly feel like it.

That’s the plan.  Just trying to get it done.  Yet again.

 

 

Groovin’

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Published on: February 6, 2011

Why are things so difficult sometimes?

I was just telling a friend about how it is when you get in a good groove:  everything’s easy, the decisions are like second nature.  It’s as though your first instinct is to do the healthy thing… and everything else falls away, because it doesn’t support your long-term goals.

And when that groove eludes?  Man, it’s the pits.  Every healthy choice is a struggle.  It’s not even as though I WANT the ice cream… it’s more a basic need.  Like I might not survive without it. Which is ridiculous (well, maybe).

When things are going well?  I can’t even remember how much of a challenge it was, pre-groove.  And when things aren’t going so well?  It’s beyond my ability to even think in the long-term and how what I’m doing sabotages what I truly want.

I’m such a black or white, all or nothing person:  I don’t live in between on any level.  All in or all out.

Anyway – I’m really trying to find that groove.  Monday starts official half marathon training.  And Hal (of Hal Higdon fame, for those new folks here) will be pretty disappointed in me if I don’t step up and do it up right again.  And if I’m being honest?  I’m scared.  Scared to fail.  Maybe scared to succeed.  Or scared because I know how much work succeeding will require and I wonder if I even have that in me.

I surprised myself last season with as dedicated as I was to my half marathon training — that literally had never happened before.  And so I approach this race — with a similar goal in mind — with a little bit of trepidation:  do I have it in me to do it again?

Right now, this is my plan:  to take it just one week at a time.  When I contemplate the plan in its entirety, I get all freaked out about the mileage and the difficulty and the consistency required (especially with 2 feet of snow currently on the ground!).

So, I’ll break it down.  Next week, I have 6 runs that I need to get done.  I’ve got my schedule and plans in place to make sure that I get it all in.  And I’ll see where I’m at by the end of the week.

And then, I’ll take a deep breath and move on to Week 2.  That simple.

Time to start that groove.

Thundersnow! Snowmaggedon 2011!

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Published on: February 2, 2011

Yup – the big one finally hit the Midwest.  The east coast has been hit a few times this winter season already, but we’d been mostly spared, and probably spent too much time laughing at those poor folks out there.

But now?  Chicago is looking like a nuclear white-out.  And it’s pretty damn awesome (at least from my viewpoint… sitting here, warm in my kitchen, power still on, lots of food and wine in the fridge).

I mean, really how often do you get to see Mother Nature at her most ferocious?  Probably only a couple of occasions in a lifetime, right?  Last night, between the 60+ mph wind gusts and thundersnow and lightning (yes, you read that right:  ”thundersnow”), it was a great performance.  And it definitely shows you who’s in charge, no matter what kind of 4-wheel drive truck you might own.

So, for the time being, treadmill and bike trainer workouts (swim?  who does that anymore?) are on hold in lieu of shoveling workouts.  And – this is going to be one long, ongoing workout, that’s for sure.

See, I’m just one girl with one crappy shovel (I refuse to buy a snowblower – or even a better shovel since I’m moving to a maintenance-free townhouse in just over a week…) and it will literally take me hours to dig out of this.

I spent 45 minutes this morning just removing the hip-high drift that had snuggled up to my garage.  Well – scratch that – I actually only removed a truck-wide swath of the hip-high drift.  I should have worn my HRM so I could tell you exactly how hard I was working!  Cardio and strength-training, all rolled up into one chilly, convenient package.

The snow seems to be slowing down a little, and while I’m actually working from home, I think I’ll sneak out for an hour over what would be my lunch to try and make another small dent in the snow so I have some hope of being able to drive out tomorrow morning.  When I was last out there, I have 2-3 more hip-high drifts to deal with down the driveway, as well as the foot of snow in between the drifts.

So, I’ve got my work cut out for me, that’s for sure, though the sun’s come out which is making it look deceptively nice outside (next up?  arctic temperatures…) which makes me *almost* want to get out there and dig in.

Of course, I wouldn’t complain if a snow-blowing neighbor or enterprising kid wanted to do it for me…

Friday PSA

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Published on: January 28, 2011

When your trainer greets you with a smile and a twinkle in her eye, and says, “So, can we work your legs hard today?” under no circumstances should you say yes.  Well, not unless practically needing a walker to get around for the next few days appeals to you.

Just trust me on this.

January 1st, take 2: an update

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Published on: January 26, 2011

Just a quick note.

I’m 3 days into my second try at starting my New Year’s resolutions.  And how am I doing?

Not too shabby, actually.  I’ve hit the treadmill every day so far — nothing jaw-dropping, not even close — but I’ve gotten it done despite the fact that I had absolutely no desire to sweat at all.

And you know what?  I felt better for having done it.  Lesson learned?  Perhaps.

My nutrition hasn’t exactly been spot-on, but at least I’m no longer consuming crap like it’s about to be outlawed.  Or heavily taxed.  Even just a little moderation in my diet has trimmed a few pounds off.

So far, so good…

Of course, today I’m close to dead on my feet (or, dead on my ass, since I basically sit in front of a computer all day).  The last thing I want to do is train.  But, sweat I will.  It helps that I have a trainer beatdown scheduled (this is why I pay for someone to inflict pain… it’d be too easy for me to skip otherwise)… and while I’m there, I might as well run a little, right?  Make better use of my time?  Exactly.

I suppose that’s MY state of the union address.  At least for right now.  Let’s see if I can keep this going for a few more days at least…

January 1st, take 2

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Published on: January 23, 2011

I’m big on New Year’s resolutions.  For years now, I’ve taken time as the year changes from old to new, and assess how the previous year went and figure out what I want to do for the next 365 days.  I like having a plan and all that.

Sometimes it feels a bit cliche, but I don’t know – there’s just something about a new year that seems like it’s a good time for a fresh start.  It’s all holiday good cheer and twinkling lights and optimism for the year ahead and it seems like there’s no way the pie-in-the-sky plans will fail.

And then, all of a sudden, it’s mid-January.  Dark.  Cold.  A little depressing, to be perfectly honest.  Not exactly the kind of month that inspires you to be a better person, is it?

I laid out 10 resolutions for myself this year.  Some personal, some race-related, some that address my overall well-being.  And while I’ve got an appointment with myself at the end of every month to review the resolutions and see if I’m heading in the right direction, I thought it might do me some give myself a good mid-month ass-kicking… because, as I said in a previous post, the ice cream is winning.

It seems like every year features some sort of resolve to eat better, lose weight, be more healthy… however it is that I decide to word it for that particular year.  And that hasn’t changed for this year — I’m determined to focus on eating healthy, cutting out processed food and drop some weight by sticking to that. So far this January, I haven’t been doing anything to help myself out here.  Toss in a lot of stress (the whole buying/selling a house thing) and swirl it up with not getting nearly enough sleep (and remember – sleep is The Secret to me being happy) and I can’t seem to stay away from the crap food.  So far it hasn’t really hurt me too much — my weight just seems to bounce around in the same 3-pound range — but this needs to change.  Just think how far along I could be if I had been doing things right?

The other main set of resolutions involve getting faster.  Shaving a few minutes off my half marathon PR.  Finally kicking the marathon curse off my shoulders and going sub-4.  You want to know what helps with all this?  Actual training.  Huh.  Whodda thunk it?  Up until this past week, life has been a big ball of chaos, and time when I wasn’t getting my house ready for market was a rare commodity.  Ironically, running is the one thing that HELPS me deal with stress… and it was (is?) the one thing I wasn’t doing.  And, you know – I love running, but does that stop me from getting into a bad cycle where I don’t run because I’m stressed even though that’s the one thing that would relieve the stress?  Nope – I’m completely capable of being a dumbass, it seems.

So, starting tomorrow (since I’m currently snarfing down a Calzone for dinner), I’m back on the wagon.  I ran this weekend… and even further than a few miles.  I’ll continue this week:  good training sessions, at least 5-6 runs, food decisions geared towards making me feel better.

Because that’s what it’s all about:  it’s not really the losing weight, or the specific race times… it’s about making me feel good about myself and what I’m able to accomplish.  I think I sometimes forget how when you start making decisions that are good for you, that this can steamroll just as easily as the bad stuff can.  And once you get yourself going back in the right direction, that good feeling becomes it’s own self-propelling cycle.

So – hold me to the fire here:  keep me honest, keep me accountable.  I know exactly what I want and what I need to do to get there, I’ve just got to get this butt back in gear.

Right after I finish this calzone.

New recruit

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Published on: January 14, 2011

One of my very favorite things to do is to bring someone new into my world of triathlons and running.  Sometimes they are reluctantly dragged into it, kicking and screaming, quite sure that they’re going to absolutely hate it.  Other times they have no idea what exactly they’re agreeing to but go into it willingly enough, until – of course – they figure out that, um, yea, this might not exactly be fun (let’s just say there was a long night of drinking after a softball game where I talked a friend into doing her first 5k the next morning… picking her up at 5am… hee).

I’ve mentioned before, I’m in the middle of picking up and moving.  And one of the things I’m most excited about is the opportunity I’m going to have to get myself a training partner!  I’ve always talked about how I dislike the solitary aspect of training, and how I’m much more a social-triathlete than a competitive one, so this is like a gift from the training heavens.

Yes – I’m taking in a roommate when I move.  But that’s not who I’m referring to.  By being closer to work, and closer to people who will be able to help out, as soon as I’m settled in?  Yea, I’m getting myself a four-legged training pal.  And I cannot WAIT.

Last time around, my dog was the epitome of lazy:  I would leave him home for 11-12 hours at a time and when I would get home?  He’d look at me from his perch on the couch and cock his head at me as if to say, “Tired?  Wanna nap with me for awhile?”  Yup.  I had the best dog.

But he was never a runner.  And that was my fault – I got him from the pound when he was older and I never took the time to properly train him on leash.  He would be okay walking, but running?  He would either be sprinting ahead or stubbornly stopping to sniff and mark things behind me.

This time around I’m doing it right.  I’m going to make sure I make the effort to train the new recruit to run with me.  Make the new pooch a motivator for me to get off my duff and get outside, too.  Gotta walk the dog, right?

I’ll probably go the same route as last time — go to the pound, find a dog that needs a good home and some lovin’ (and who’s already been house-trained!).  And one that will give me the puppy-dog eyes guilt trip when I’m sitting on the couch, ice cream in hand, instead of pounding out some miles, dog at my side.  My future pup has NO idea that he’ll be one of the few dogs around that will BE the trainer as well as the one being trained!

Yup – I’m indoctrinating the newest breed of triathamutt.  Super Dog!

The ice cream is winning

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Published on: January 11, 2011

You know, the holidays are always tough:  tons of food around and everyone seems to encourage the idea that any sweet imbued with the warm fuzziness of Christmas is calorie-free.  Let me be the first to tell you:  this is not the truth.

Still – I managed to maintain my weight, despite indulging in my fair share of the holiday treats.  I mean, heck – it’s easier to skip dinner than it is to skip the Christmas cookies, right?  Seemed like a fair trade to me, and while not the smartest way to go about things, it worked.

But now that the holidays are over and all sorts of good, healthy resolutions have been made, I thought it would be easy.  At this point last year, I had completely committed to a nutritious lifestyle and was on my way to dropping 10 pounds, just in the month of January.

This year?  Yea, not so much.  Part of the problem is a lack of focus:  I’m in the midst of packing up my house to move to a new place, and I’m overwhelmed and stressed by the whole process.  Now, I’m pretty good at moving stuff — I change houses about every 5 years — but this time seems different.  Between the market being so bad that my house will have to look PERFECT and the fact that I’m drastically downsizing and have to get rid of a ton of stuff, I’m finding myself wandering from room to room, eyes glazed over, too paralyzed with stress to actually be productive and get things done.

Of course, the end result is that I’m not making time to train. I’ve got a very specific deadline for getting the house in order – there isn’t much that gets more priority than this.  And because I’m over-the-top stressed?  Yea, I’m stress eating.  And I made a major mistake:  I brought ice cream into the house (it was a BOGO offer! couldn’t pass it up!) and now I’m consumed with the idea of, well, consuming it.

So, I’m headed in the wrong direction.  I closed out 2010 headed in the right direction but this month has seen the skid marks resulting from the massive braking and reversal of direction I’m doing on all the good stuff.

My goal right now is to try and hold steady for this month.  Just get through this.  Once I actually move (which should be mid-February), I’ll have no excuses.  I’ll be closer to work (saving a LOT of commute time), getting more sleep and no longer stressing about making my house all beautiful and such for the market.  Sounds like perfection, right?

Life will be all butterflies and rainbows (and sidewalks that don’t need to be shoveled by me!) and I can’t wait to be in at a point where everything has no choice but to come together.

And until then?  I can see the light (bright sunlight?) at the end of the tunnel, and I’m just holdin’ on ….

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